Senior Mudslide turned into Senior Rockslide

The Bi-Line can confirm that the Senior Mudslide will continue in full force for the Class of 2020 amid campus construction and coronavirus concerns. The new Senior Mudslide has been dubbed the “2020 Senior Rockslide” by Westminster’s administration.

         “We really wanted the seniors to have a unique experience this year with the Senior Rockslide,” said head of the Upper School Cindy Trask. “We really wanted to capitalize on how much students enjoyed daily rock blasting in front of Adam’s Gate, so we figured that it would be the perfect place to have this year’s mudslide.”

Faculty, alongside the administration, addressed seniors during a Zoom video call on March 27 to announce the Rockslide. Seniors, in particular, expressed worry over the event’s cancellation, and the newfound excitement gave many faith that their beloved tradition will carry on. Seniors played “The Box” by Roddy Rich in unison on Zoom to communicate their glee.

“I am so excited for the Senior Rockslide and being able to spend time with my friends,” said senior Jo-Mama Stankey. “I’ve been sliding down rocks since I was little and I feel like sliding down the rock pit on campus will be the perfect way to cap off my Westminster experience.”

Many parents shared their child’s enthusiasm upon hearing about the new event.

         “It is thrilling to learn that my little Suzie will be able to partake in this sacred tradition at Westminster,” said senior parent Judith “Judy” Neutron. “The rocks add an extra flare that I’m sure my daughter will remember for a lifetime!”

         The administration has been working tirelessly to ensure that the Senior Rockslide will be a hit.

         “This project has actually been in the pipeline since the start of the school year,” said Trask. “In fact, the only reason we did rock blasting this year was to ensure that seniors had a perfect rocky slope to slide down.”

         Following the announcement, a small fringe group was formed, claiming that the event was “dangerous,” “harmful,” and “would put students in peril.” However, students and parents alike have been assured by Westminster that the Senior Rockslide will be perfectly safe for all.

         “We tested the rocky with crash test dummies,” said Trask. “In only one of ten trials, the dummy’s head flew off, proving that this event passes our safety standards.”

         This once-in-a-lifetime event is something that Westminster hopes is shared beyond the campus gates, and the school has created a new hashtag, #Westminsterrockandroll2020, for Westminstagram.

         “I cannot wait to post my Senior Rockslide photo on Instagram,” said senior Dobby Dahouself. “I’m worried that the dirt and bruises may make me look bad, but I will do it all for the ‘gram.”

         The event will be topped off with a final ceremony for seniors where construction crews will complete a ceremonial rock blasting.

         “I’m most excited for the rock blasting ceremony,” said Dahouself. “I’ve been told that there will be a ‘splash zone’ where we can get super close to the blasting. I had the chance to be in the water splash zone during the dolphin show at the Georgia Aquarium, and I can’t wait for the carnage that is to come.”

         Make sure to tune into WCAT on May 30 for the 2020 Senior Rockslide. Hopefully it will rock.