Westminster in Brief [Satire]

April 1, 2015

New SAT replaces vocabulary with FRIENDS trivia Earlier this year, the Collegeboard announced that they were changing the SAT to include less vocabulary. However, this last Monday, they announced a new section to determine e...

Flik confesses to egregious lunch menu mistake [Satire]

Alyssa Donké, April Fools!

April 1, 2015

After almost a full school year of defending its homogenous lunch choices, Flik has finally come to terms with the criticisms surrounding its decisions. Not persuaded by grumblings throughout the school, Flik finally broke down as...

Student discovers Narnia inside lost and found [Satire]

Thorn, April Fools!

April 1, 2015

On Mar. 16, senior James Smith found the entrance to the mythical kingdom popularly known as Narnia beneath 23 L.L. Bean jackets and several hundred copies of Beloved in the Campbell lost-and-found. “I was just looking for my croakie...